Hey guise! My unreal name is Ruka, and I’m a 17 y/y college student of SPUQC under the course of BSIT. Basically yet obviously, my interests are anime, games, and cosplaying as everyone knows. So yeah, these are all the things that you should know. :)

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This is so shocking.

When I was 14 years old, and my other friends were 16, 15, 13 and 10, the doctors told us that we'll spend more time with him for the next 7 years. We were okay with that.. still sad, but this is reality. I don't know how could I imagine someone really close to you dying.. Well I have imagined it, but I keep erasing those pictures in my mind. 7 more years, that's still a long way to go right?

I'm 16 years old now.
And I'm going to be a college student this June. Not sure of the date, but it has been confirmed that I will be studying in St. Paul University - Quezon City. He's admitted to Ateneo de Manila University. Such a smart guy, he's also cool and passionate. Very caring and patient. The ideal guy that I'd want to be with in the near future. He's in my hands and I got his heart, but.. For how long?

5 more years.
There's still time right? That is still a long way right? The time is slow when you keep on waiting. I accept that fact, that's why I keep on waiting. But when I think about it, it hurts so much. I've always dreamed of him with future kids and future bungalow that I've always wanted so much. We swore on a garden back then and I still cherish the sweet memories. That was when we were still innocent kids. But now that we're not, I don't know how things will go from now on.

N more years..months?

Today he got admitted at the hospital for coughing so much blood. He passed out and the only person in their house was his little brother. He was so scared, he did not know what to do. Being away from their home for so many years, he can't even approach neighbors but he did anyway, for the sake of his older brother. And then they rushed him to St. Lukes, 11am?

He is having problems with breathing, and he can't move his feet. I am not sure why, but I want to go there right now. Why do we have to be so far from each other? I hate my place right now. I need to be with him right now. Why are the people so close to me live in a very far place? I hate it. If only I had the money, the freedom and enough courage to leave this house at this moment, I could have done that months and years before but I can't.

His little brother called the very first person in Juvenille that he'd count on.. And it wasn't me, but it was Allister. And now he's on his way to St. Lukes. After Allister, he called me.. I was too shocked to say anything.. I wanted to cry too but I coudn't, I was forced to talk because he was running out of credits. I told him to stay by his side and take care of him. I'm sorry that I couldn't rush in-- before I could finish the whole sentence, he told me how jerk I was. "Aren't you his girlfriend?! Dapat nandito ka, but you're slumped on your seat there siguro. You're the worst!" and he hunged up.. I couldn't forget those words. This is the first time Fern and I fought.

And right now at this very hour, Allister, Elliot, Tala, Duke and Kiddo are waiting outside his room to check what the doctor has to say. I wanted to be there so bad. My friends and his friends are there, praying for his safety and as Fern has said, I'm in hear slumped in my sit doing nothing at all. I want to go there so bad right now. They are contacting his mother but she's still at work, I guess. If she knew, she'd call my mom and escort me at the hospital so I can see him. So I hope his mother picks up the her phone. I want to see him.. back to top?